Do you ever feel sad?

Because I hate being sad.

Photo by Nathan Dumlao on Unsplash

How often do you get sad or annoyed?
Recently, it’s been happening a lot for me and it’s been so hard trying to navigate my feelings. One day I feel completely fine, and the next I’m overwhelmed with emotions I can’t even explain.

I was sad… until I felt numb.

Couldn’t process the feelings. Couldn’t even feel them.
I was just there, no reaction.

Then it all started to pile up.
Resentment for my inner self.
I hated that I was sad, but I couldn’t help it.

I was so used to being sad and brushing it off, but this time it refused to go. Everything started to feel unfamiliar. I found myself irritated by the smallest things, constantly on edge, hissing under my breath. And though I didn’t like how it made me feel, I couldn’t stop it.

My heart felt heavy, so I thought, why not write this down?
Unfiltered. Maybe I’d feel better.
And to be honest, I think I do.

My friend told me to find the root of my sadness, and I did. We talked about it, and I feel a little lighter. Sadness is a heavy feeling and it’s hard for me to sit in it. But I’m trying. I believe I’ll feel better soon.

If you’re reading this and you don’t understand your feelings right now, it’s okay.
Try not to ignore or suppress them like I did.

Take your time. 🫶🏾

It’s just a feeling, not a personality, and it doesn’t have to stay with you forever.

I know I’ll feel better soon.
And I’m proud of myself for trying.

Thanks for reading.
This was unplanned, just me writing in my rawest form.
This is my safe space and I’m learning to treat it like one.

Till next time. 😊❤️